behindthec: (gabilliam)
[personal profile] behindthec
Title: Full Moons and Minor Keys (3/7)
Author: [profile] lolab
Pairing: William Beckett/Gabe Saporta
Rating: R. ish.
Summary: I’ve always thought William could convert an asexual, a priest, even a motorcycle dyke; and being nothing so extreme myself, I sure as fuck had no hope.
Disclaimer: The keyword in fan fiction is FICTION. Don’t own Bilvy or Gabanti; I respect them very much; just can't help seeing the world through slashy subtext-tinted glasses, and once a story starts writing itself in my head, I have to get it out.
Warnings: BOYSECKZ (warning? more like incentive), plenty of creative swearing, Gabe being all dirty and Gabe-like, flagrant abuse of the '70s handkerchief code, shameless disregard for reality (i.e. girlfriends, etc.).
Notes: This chapter (I KNOW IT'S SHORT AS HELL, don't worry; the next one’ll be longer) would be dedicated to the delightfully charming and talented [profile] yourfirsttry, but she hasn't finished my porn yet. :P  Therefore, it is dedicated to the brilliant  [profile] ourgossip_lips.  She knows why. ;)
 
Comments = happiness. I also accept hand jobs cookies in place of feedback. <3
 
Previous Chapters:
 


3.
 
Disregard the footsteps
And we'll never tell a soul
- All Time Low
 
 
 
The third time it happened, three weeks back into touring, we had an excuse: William got stage fright.
 
William never got stage fright – who the hell does after this many years doing it (except Alex, because he’s adorable that way). But god damn it, my luck occasionally hit the jackpot and that’s how I found him, all nerves and bitten nails and darting eyes.
 
We all ran backstage after our set, high off the crowd and falling over each other, our laughter hitting the walls and stagehands, and fell upon William seated in our dressing room looking small and crumpled, legs crossed, bottom lip between his teeth. He didn’t say a damn word, just looked straight at me until one by one everyone seemed to get it that they weren’t supposed to be there -- chalk it up to that delicately commanding aura Bill’s always had -- and the last I heard was Nate’s “But—” before Ryland and Vicky dragged him away and the silence struck.
 
Struck hard; stung, snake-like. Paralyzed me.
 
Or was that just the solitude and the freshly locked door?
 
Maybe we talked for ten minutes, maybe ten seconds. I asked questions, dumb-ass predictable shit, and he answered, equally driven by propriety – “I don’t know, man, I haven’t felt like this since the first time I ever played live,” and he smiled, that radiantly nervous one and all I could say was, “Maybe you’re just stressed, maybe you need to... unwind.”
 
Which was the absolute lamest come-on ever, so lame I didn’t even mean it as a come-on, but another ten seconds later his pants were in a heap on the cold grimy floor, the same cold grimy floor digging into my knees as I sucked him off in the cheaply lit overheated dressing room six minutes before his set, distant backstage footsteps and muffled warm-up music just barely colliding with our violently distracted ears, his grip in my hair twice as rough as I’d consider normal to compensate for the suffocating silence we knew had to be sustained, and I nearly couldn’t bear how much I fucking loved it.
 
I almost came in my pants when he opened his eyes, watching my mouth working his cock like it was my religion, and said, “God, you’re fucking gorgeous.”
 
I thought, shortly after, that that may have been the moment William Beckett officially became a flaming homo.
 
Which really, honestly shocked me, because despite everything, I’d never actually dared to think of him in those terms – or myself, for that matter.
 
And this was clearly a really really bad realization because all it did was fuel and encourage those feelings that told me maybe, just maybe, there was a possibility of an us somehow and believe me, those feelings didn’t need fueling, and if anything, needed discouraging.
 
But gay, straight, bi, pansexual or other; fuck buddies or not... I knew William too well, and I knew my fantasies of him would never amount to anything but just that. I didn’t know if he’d ever really been in love, wasn’t even sure he was capable of it... and god knows if he were, I wouldn’t be the target. That’s just William. I was sure of it. Couldn’t even muster enough logic to tell you why; I was just so fucking, depressingly sure.
 
And reciting this thought in my head like a prayer, I worked so hard, so earnestly to keep myself grounded.
 
I should have known it was futile. Should’ve never forgotten: William is a mystery – the way grass is green and the sky is blue and two plus two equals four. It’s imprinted in his soul, I guess you could say. Forget whatever you think you know, because... shit; you don’t.
 
I’d learn that later, and almost too late.
 
Seven minutes later I watched them from offstage, licking the taste of him off my lips, weak in the knees and not from kneeling on the floor.
 
It was the best fucking performance I’d ever seen him give.
 
 
/ch. 3


(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 05:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yourfirsttry.livejournal.com
*FLIPS A SHIT*
I'll read then comment again

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Date: 2008-03-09 05:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yourfirsttry.livejournal.com
"I thought, shortly after, that that may have been the moment William Beckett officially became a flaming homo."

Ahaahahha.
And eeeee, I'm excited for learning about the "I’d learn that later, and almost too late."
...that is assuming that has something to do with the story and isn't just THERE for the sake of being there.

Awww dip, this is going to end horribly depressingly, isn't it?
Like, suicidal, emocity, deadly, depressing.

Oh, AND... this is fab. Ee he he. This whole story so far has been sex in different places, and I didn't realize that until just now because you write it well and not just porn-tastically.

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Date: 2008-03-09 06:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] irishsaints.livejournal.com
*kajshdlkfajsda*


yay! gabe made Bilvy feel better!!

and uhm...I’d learn that later, and almost too late.

i really want to know more about this....=)

can't wait for more!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 06:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
hehe thanks! :) yeah... now i'm worried ppl are going to make that more significant than it is... but that's all i'm going to say. ;)

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ourgossip-lips.livejournal.com
OMG YAY.
I FUCKING LOVE YOU.
AND THIS.
AND ADLKJFSDOIFLK
You write so beautifully.

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
i love you too, and YAY. :D thank you as always... squee! :)

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jessicamee.livejournal.com
love this story. mucho love. <3

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
thank you. :D i have your icon in poster form in my kitchen! hehe!

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mirrorscrack.livejournal.com
this is so fucking good. better then any of the shit ive been writing. but man, the short chapter made me want to cry or something.

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
dude i know i actually feel GUILTY for posting such a short one. i almost combined it w/ 4, but it wouldn't work... each chapter has to cover One Time, y'know. bah. the rest are longer. but anyway, thank you so much. :)

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Date: 2008-03-09 07:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tailover5.livejournal.com
i love this.
its great(:

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Date: 2008-03-09 08:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
thank you! and OMG, YOUR ICON. !!! <3

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Date: 2008-03-09 08:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dominationx.livejournal.com
you = mega love.
i love this story sooo much.
and the flaming homo bit made me laugh, cause that (along with "screaming bender") is what I like to, uh, ~nickname, everyone.
<3

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Date: 2008-03-09 08:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
thank you... and ooh, i like screaming bender! i need that on a t-shirt. :D (which perhaps i will then attempt to give to william at warped this year. :P)

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Date: 2008-03-09 08:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] noteto--self.livejournal.com
I THOUGHT BILLVY WAS IN YOUR PANTS NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND.
*pouty* I wanted to be in Billvy's pants in your pants. =[[

*goes off to read fic*

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 08:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] noteto--self.livejournal.com
*flails*
I had to actively stop myself from giggling out loud the entire time I was reading this because my sister is in the next room and she would've gone wtf and come in to see what I was laughing at.
Oh man. If there is Gabe, there is religion. If there is William...at least one person is missing pants.
Which just reminded of the episode of Veronica Mars I watched last night, featuring the quote; "Logan, when did you stop wearing pants?"

Mann, this is so awesome. And you have to continue it, even if I don't continue my basement fic.

(and to tease you, I am using my Beckett icons because I haven't uploaded any gabilliam ones yet)

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Date: 2008-03-09 09:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saykendrawithme.livejournal.com
aghhhh i love this. ^__^ i love that you keep it light and funny but serious at the same time. i hate overly romantic fics. funny = good, you = funny, therefore you = good. writer. ah, i have weird brain. but thank you for writing this.

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Date: 2008-03-09 09:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
gah, that is so sweet. :) and thank YOU for reading! i'm glad you enjoyed. :D

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Date: 2008-03-09 09:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] losingmy-sanity.livejournal.com
i have no words.
just squealy noises and giggles.
i am ashamed.

(but i still love you =])
<333

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Date: 2008-03-09 09:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
i heart squealy noises and giggles! :D and i love you too. :)

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Date: 2008-03-09 10:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bunniesontoast.livejournal.com
Poor Gabe :-(
You just wanna hit Billvy over the head and yell at him to go and love him a bit.
You and your fic are both totally awesome ^_^

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 10:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
heheeee... thank you! though don't judge bilvy too quickly... he's got more going on than meets the eye... and that's all i'm gonna say. ;)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 10:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] betterasalover.livejournal.com
I thought, shortly after, that that may have been the moment William Beckett officially became a flaming homo.

LMFAO. Seriously, best/funniest part ever.

My heart just keeps breaking for Gabe, and I just keep getting the urge to smack Will and tell him to realize how deeply in love with Gabe he is.

I should have known it was futile. Should’ve never forgotten: William is a mystery – the way grass is green and the sky is blue and two plus two equals four. It’s imprinted in his soul, I guess you could say. Forget whatever you think you know, because... shit; you don’t.

Beautiful. I am in awe of your writing. You're brilliant. [:

I seriously cant' wait for more; they need to get together or I might just implode.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 10:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
GAHHH i love when ppl quote. :D *blush*

i'm so glad you liked! thank you! don't implode, just be patient. ;) ("be paaatient... behaaaave...")

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Date: 2008-03-09 11:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] minus-four.livejournal.com
William is a mystery - aw, Gabe.
small and crumpled, legs crossed, bottom lip between his teeth - aw Bilvy!
*squishes them both*

I’d learn that later, and almost too late. Hmm...

Awesome but I wish it was longer :( lol

<3

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-09 11:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
I KNOW I'M SORRY. :P the next one will be longer, i promise...

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Date: 2008-03-09 11:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ohhhhshestoxic.livejournal.com
oh em geee
that was short. ]:
why is this?

more soon would be uber rad, though :D

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Date: 2008-03-09 11:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
LOL, good question... honestly, it just wrote itself that way. (i really don't write; the stuff writes itself.) very straightforward, no fluff, just very fast and hard and unexpected. like a whirlwind - the way it must have seemed to gabe, y'know? he finishes a set, finds bill, ends up on his knees and then one breath later, bill's on stage, taking that one breath away.

all that said, i PROMISE next sunday's chapter is longer. :)

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Date: 2008-03-10 12:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] principessahope.livejournal.com
Ahh! I can't believe I missed chapter 2!
But I read it and I loved it and I loved this :)
maybe, just maybe, there was a possibility of an us somehow and believe me, those feelings didn’t need fueling, and if anything, needed discouraging.
That line? Just, aww God I loved it.
<3

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Date: 2008-03-10 12:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
squeeeee, thank you! :) poor, poor gabe, eh?

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Date: 2008-03-10 12:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gangsta-shibby.livejournal.com
I absolutely fucking love this story. Seriously.

More soon!

XD

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Date: 2008-03-10 01:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
squee, thank you! :) more will arrive next sunday...

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Date: 2008-03-10 01:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saykendrawithme.livejournal.com
LMAO
trust me, i've heard em before, and i actually have a fair bit by them. but i did one of those "You know what? I think i'll download every song by them EVER" things. XD
i just decided to blame it on your excellent fic. ;)

and i'll check out that video RIGHT NOW. :P

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Date: 2008-03-10 01:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
YAY!!!!!!!!!

yeah, i have loads of little videos that will make you fall in love with gabe so hardcore you won't know what hit you. *siiiigh* :)

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Date: 2008-03-10 02:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] conquer-minds.livejournal.com
I should have known it was futile. Should’ve never forgotten: William is a mystery – the way grass is green and the sky is blue and two plus two equals four. It’s imprinted in his soul, I guess you could say. Forget whatever you think you know, because... shit; you don’t.

Dammit, you write really well. And I am completely in love with this fic.

...

So, uh, yeah, um, I hear tomorrow's Sunday as well...

UPDATE, Y/Y?!?!??!?!

;D

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Date: 2008-03-10 10:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
HHAHAHAHA. if it's sunday, why am i up at 6:45 for work??? :P

thank you though. ;)

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Date: 2008-03-10 11:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thanku4thvenom.livejournal.com
You write so well with such poetic, creative and appropriate wording, it's unreal.And very, very excellent. Kinda short, but the quality makes up for it.

Trust me though , i am not complaining. Nope.

I love this. It's like someone telling you that you just got a week off. It just brightens the whole day.
Love. :)
Update soon please, for the sake of us little addicted ppl.
Peace :)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-10 11:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
god, what lovely things to say. :) thank you! i'm glad it brightened your day. :)

i update on sundays. (you can get the next chapter early if you write me porn. ;)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-10 11:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] laurenlobster.livejournal.com
This is just too beautiful, i really adore it more than breathing

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-10 11:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
damn! LOL. thank you! but, y'know, keep breathing and all. ;)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-11 12:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] re-evolve.livejournal.com
I friggin' love the last sentence.

or, you know, the entire chapter. either one. XD gods, I love this story. gabe's thoughts still make me giggle. they're so great.

can't wait for the next chapter!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-11 01:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
really? i was very conflicted over how to end this chapter. i feel it's not momentous enough. but thank you!

gabe's thoughts are special. ;) hehe.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-11 03:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iamiamamachine.livejournal.com
DAMN YOU, WOMAN. (...man? 'woman' is kind of my word but i usually have no idea of the gender of the people i'm using it to. goddamn internet.) how can you leave me gasping for more (nopunintended) every time you post?

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-11 04:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
LOLZ. i've kind of got the genderfucking thing going, but i prefer "man". ;)

i happen to like leaving you gasping for more, sweet-pea. ;)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-11 10:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] prettyoddstef.livejournal.com
YAY LOVE IT
again :D
NEED MORE
A-D-D-I-C-T-E-D!!!!!! XD

(no subject)

Date: 2008-03-11 10:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
yayyyy thank you. :D you'll have to wait until sunday, sweet-pea. ;) (unless you write me porn.)

(no subject)

From: [identity profile] prettyoddstef.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-03-11 10:15 pm (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

Date: 2008-05-11 06:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] killeleanor.livejournal.com
I've said it before and I'll say it again: YOU WIN AT LIFE.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-05-11 09:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
hehe thank you! squeeeeeeeeeee

(no subject)

Date: 2008-07-06 12:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vickeeh.livejournal.com
the 'flaming homo' line...yeah it was the cherry on top of a very good chapter!!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-07-06 01:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lolab.livejournal.com
hahaha thank you! glad you are enjoying. :)

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