Colin

i just ended a four-year relationship. fuck zen, fuck dealing, fuck maturity. i need to not be in my head. like, a lot.

picspam me?

cybersex?

lolcats?

failpics?

fly to atlanta and cuddle me?

anything?

i probably won't answer comments, but. i think that's allowed.

like red alert, only, not, ha ha, okay.

so, my crush flirt buddy self-proclaimed soulmate lovely friend, redorchids, finally convinced me to give up my entire sunday morning/afternoon (i don't think it was phrased quite like this, but that's what it took) and read this fic she wrote a few months ago. apparently i am a colossal idiot, because this fic is possibly the best thing i've ever read in bandom. yeah. i said it. definitely in my top 3-5, whatever. this one will stay with me after all others have faded. no way you can read this and not love it. the intense creativity she employs, the way she weaves panic's lyrics into it (you'll never look at any of their songs the same), the simple beauty of the writing itself; it's all stunning. some of you have complimented my use of metaphor; my stuff is elementary school drivel compared what she does in this, srsly. you will never forget this fic. also it's got some of the hottest sex i've ever read in my life. there, that perked up your ears, didn't it. :P

here it is. read the prequel/prologue first. and you have to go down every single path because they are all incredible. there. if i plug the fic any harder i'll... insert boisecks/buttplug joke here.

also, moku_youbi is possibly my favourite person in the world as well, simply for this. OH GOD. i don't deserve you guys.

i motherfucking love my flist.

that said, i am now going to do something i never do and put on my tin hat, so for those of you who have been distressed by our fandom of late...

( a slightly obsessive theory regarding the current state of panic: ryden edition. )

p.s. chapter 7 is about halfway done (there is a chance, a chance, i'll have to split it into two chapters but i really don't want to; we'll see; it's just so long already); hopefully will have it up by thursday as usual.

go read 'Cause None of Us Were Angels by atomichatred82. awesome. that's sort of the kind of realboy porn i wish i could write, for those who have been all "WHY DON'T YOU LIKE YOUR PORN?!"

exciting news: ivesia19 is going with me to see the cabbies on 4/18 AND fall out boy in atlanta the week after! \o/ EPIC. i so rarely meet LJ peeps IRL. anyone else going? we can form a coalition. or something.

random thanks to sophie for putting up with my emo. i love you.

i haven't written any of chapter 7. just a heads-up. i think i need a few days off. that was a lot of sex, and there's a lot more coming. lol. but you can has this, which will appear:

1 new message from the walkman
so who tops? spence adn i have a bet going. pls respond. love jon

i love how shameless he is. haven't decided the boys' response (if any). hey, i want some porn. get on that, internet. even if it's colin/william. (see twitter.) i wrote you lots of sex, now write me some. i know at least half a dozen of you who are in the midst of writing me some and always put it off. don't make me start naming names. :P